Organize This! Part III
She accepted the invitation, and remarked, "It will be interesting to see how you live."
I think it was actually just a case of Swenglish, and she meant to say where I live, but little did she know how close to scary she actually was.
For various reasons, any attempts at "cleaning" were conveniently left until the hour and a half before she arrived. The Guy who Likes Things Far Neater than I Do came over to assist me in my neatness preparations.
When he arrived, I was running around like a chicken with my head cut off.
"Hi, Honey. Thanks for coming over. We have exactly thirty minutes to make this place look like someone other than me lives here."
"In other words, you want to create the illusion of neatness."
"Well, it is all about appearances, isn't it?"
Meanwhile, I was pulling various knick knacks off the shelf, and setting them out on the window sill. I turned to the Mini Kitten (also known as Vessa), who was watching me intently, "Now if you knock these off, I'm going to make a cat skin rug out of you."
She appeared entirely unmoved.
The Guy who Likes Things Far Neater than I Do, in a state of brief shock, exclaimed, "Oh my God. You DO have a sense of decor. You just choose not to exercise it."
"I never said I didn't have taste. It's just been hidden underneath all of the piles of junk."
Then I decided to reassure him that he had arrived just in time, and had been spared the goriness. "By the way, you're lucky you weren't here 20 minutes ago, when I first got home. You would have found my 'organizing' methods very painful."
(I could just imagine the look of utter horror that would have been on his face had he withnessed me unflinchingly dump the entirity of the the bathroom counter into a black garbage bag, only to then stick it underneath the bed.)
"I'm glad I wasn't here either."
"But I think I've finally figured it out. I know why you're dating me. It's for my organizational skills, isn't it?"
"WHAT organizational skills?"
"Well, just so you know, I really appreciate your help. If you ever need help organizing something, I'd be happy to return the favor."
"The thought is sweet, but please forgive me if I decide not to take you up on that offer."
Followed by muffled snickers.