Tuesday, April 04, 2006

A journey of a thousand miles, one step at a time

One of the first evenings that we spent together, you told me that a sign of a good relationship is not that the other person asks you to change, but the fact that he or she inspires you to be a better person. In other words, you complement each other and bring out each other's best.

When I’m with you, I feel no need for pretences and you give me the freedom to be myself. At the same time, there are things about myself that I would like to change, not just for you, but also for myself. Being with you gives me the inspiration and the strength to make those changes, which don't always come easy (especially for those of us who have on our own for awhile).

We are both making small adjustments in the way we do things, to make room for the other person. These changes are not happening over night, but gradually, one at a time, as we get to know each other.

The fact I don’t doubt myself or the relationship when we’re not together signals to me that the bond that has developed between us in such a short time has the potential to grow stronger. The future is suddenly not just about “me, myself, and I;” there is a “We” on the horizon. And I think it's important to both of us not to loose ourselves in the "We," but rather to enhance the individual "I's"', together.

You do make me feel safe. There is a security in knowing that someone will be there, even when things are no longer glamorous, or when I get sick to my stomach. There is a security in having the freedom to make mistakes and learn from them, and being able to accept the fact that no one (including myself) is or can be perfect, all of the time.

When I say "security," I don't mean it as a “guarantee” or as a “certainty,” for I don't think that such things actually exist when it comes to human relationships. I use “security” in the sense of “refuge” or “sanctuary,” somewhere where you can take the mask off, somewhere you can relax, somewhere you can be yourself, and somewhere you can laugh.

Right now, that somewhere is with you.

I don’t know where we’ll end up, but I'd really like to find out.

And just remember what Confucious said.

Happy Birthday.


Anonymous Swede in Kansas said...

=) Beautiful!

3:49 AM  
Blogger Ms.Take said...

Warm fuzzy feeling.

10:19 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

"you told me that a sign of a good relationship is (...) the fact that he or she inspires you to be a better person."

- Ripped off from a movie, a blockbuster movie at that. Hmmm.

12:20 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Confucius said happy birthday?

1:55 PM  
Blogger Curiosa said...

Anonymous I - I don't really care that quote comes from Hollywood or not. Movies imitate life, although not necessarily in all its complexity. Regardless, I like the thought.

Anonymous II - Confucious didn't say Happy Birthday. Marilyn Monroe did. Confucious did say, however, that a journey of a thousand miles begins with one step.

3:15 PM  
Blogger eff said...

Confusius also said "ow, those noodles were way too hot, I burned my tongue" but no one likes to quote him on that.

Congratulations on the lurvy lurve, by the way. Can't have too much of the good stuff, can you?

11:54 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Yeah, lurve is all well and good, but it does not make for good blogging, or even a maintenance of standards. I am sorry, I am not begrudgning you anything here, but...well, I miss this blog is all. One by one, good funny "single people" blogs go to the wall when their authors find themselves permanently "happy". If ever there was overwhelming proof that the "suffering artist" theory is, in fact, spot on, then the blog "lurve-metamorphosis" phenomenon is it.

Oh well, maybe I should try getting a life instead.

12:21 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I am very happy for you! Let me know if/when you are coming to IF. Mr. B said it was ok but wanted to know when...Now you know how I feel with Mr. B...
Missing you!

11:44 PM  
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