Wednesday, February 08, 2006


He did it again. And unfortunately for me, he didn't wait until the yearly anniversary of Guy from the Office who Hath Not a Clue About Anything Involving Interaction with Other Human Beings Asks Curiosa On a Some Kind of Strange Date By Email. Except for this time it wasn't by email. It was by phone.


"Hi Curiosa! This is Guy from the Office who Hath Not a Clue About Anything Involving Interaction with Other Human Beings."

"Uhhhhhh, hi."

"I thought I'd call and see if you wanted to have breakfast sometime. Maybe in my apartment. Or we could go somewhere else. But we could have a lovely breakfast in my apartment. "

(We live about three blocks away from each other. Last time he asked me if I wanted to go to the movies OR to see his apartment. He seems bound and determined to get me in that apartment. About as bound and determined as I am that I am NOT going to see his apartment. Ever.)

Damn, I was hoping the ducking and dodging date-avoidance method that I've been employing the last three years would continue to work for me. And how the hell did he get my phone number?? Oh yeah, it's on my email footer. Damn IT!

"Uhhhhh, uhhhhh. Uhhhhhh-huhhhhh...Oh, really?"


For once in my life, I was speechless. The problem with this situation is that it's not entirely clear that he's fishing for a date, it could also be the case of trying to socialize with a colleague. Expect for the fact that I already socialize with the colleagues with whom I would actually want to socialize. And although I have to work with him, he's not someone I even want to be friends with, let alone go on some strange excursion to see his apartment.

I've done just about everything I can short of just being really rude (or beating him with a fermented herring). I haven't been completely direct for the very simple fact his that he is a colleague and I also have a very hard time being "not nice" to someone I see on a regular basis.

This time I saved his mobile number in my phone. So next time there will be no surprise attacks. Next time I know NOT to answer.


Blogger Me said...

Breakfast in his apartment?
I've never heard such an invitation before, but I guess anything is possible when you are desperate.
Well, they say lunch is more "innocent" than dinner, so where would that put breakfast...?
There must be something very special about his apartment, maybe worth seeing?!

1:54 AM  
Anonymous Lisa said...

Did you just hung up on him? :-P Or what did you say when you got out of your speechless phase?

4:23 AM  
Anonymous Mio said...

I agree with nightoholic, maybe the apartment is wonderful? He just wants to share it with someone. Try and say in a polite way "No, I dont want to see your appartment and never will" Well... maybe he'll just hate you forever.

11:00 AM  
Blogger Joakim Larsson said...

Men för bövelen! Säg bara "nej, jag är inte intresserad."

11:27 AM  
Blogger Viktor said...

I've never understood why some women just can't say no. Men really really suck at interpreting subtle hints about an intended mates willingnes or not to actually date. So spare the poor guy the effort of trying by just telling him NO!

8:47 PM  
Blogger Curiosa said...

nightoholic, usually the only way i have breakfast in someone's apartment is if i had stayed there the night before.

lisa, no i didn't hang up on him, i just kind of just..."uh, yeah, well, maybe sometime...but not this week..."

joakin and viktor, i haven't just said straight out, "no, i'm not interested" because there is some room for interpretation in the way he has asked me, because we're colleagues and although I believe i'm the only one at the office he has asked to "see his apartment," he has tried to get others to do other things with him. i'm not the only one who has problems handling this fellow.

8:52 PM  
Blogger Viktor said...

well in that case, either you tell him that you are perfectly happy being just work collegues and nothing more, or you accept his offer of being social and trying to make friends. I admit it is a bit odd inviting someone for breakfast.. but you coul'd tell him maybe he should invite yourself and someone else from the work. So it becomes more of a socializing hapening than a sort of date but not really date thingie.

9:33 PM  
Blogger Curiosa said...

he should invite yourself and someone else from work

that thought had crossed my mind as well, but the problem is that no one else would want to go either. the problem is that he is nice, or at least well-intentioned, but he just doesn't have a clue about how other people react to him.

10:55 PM  
Blogger Me said...

He's probably socially incompetent.
It is always tricky when someone from the office invites you personally on a "1-on-1".
It has happened to me as well, and I found myself in a similar dilemma.
Now, when someone invites me for something, I counter with: "- Sure, can I also bring my girlfriend?"
It's a positive reply, but at the same time discouraging, without being rude.

2:22 AM  

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