Sunday, November 13, 2005

Dear Potential Readers,

I guess I should make it clear from the very beginning that these stories are more a reflection on the adventures of dating in general, rather than an attempt at a real cultural commentary. The fact that it takes place in a foreign country makes it all that much better (and fun). You never know if weird behaviour on the part of your male companion is a result of the fact that 1) he comes from another culture; 2) he is a guy; 3) he is a human (i.e., personal idiosyncrasies). I think that in general most explanations can be found in #2 and #3. And I know for a fact that I have done and said some things that leave men wondering, "What the hell was that?"

Half of it is also making fun of myself in my own attempts to figure out "how to date in Sweden." I know that American dating practices, while perhaps a bit more straightforward (at least from my perspective), have also provided sufficient confusion for foreigners who have immigrated to our country.

In sum, I'll leave this with three thoughts:
1) Men (Swedish or otherwise) will continue to baffle me, and trying to figure them out is half the fun.
2) Dating in any country is a bizarre experience.
3) If I didn't love Sweden, Stockholm, and Swedes, I wouldn't have been living here for the last three years, and I wouldn't still be on the hunt for a Swede to call my very own.


F. Curiosa


Blogger Gudmundson said...


Being on the other end of this chase is no simple task, either. The Swedish male is never encouraged to take the initiative. Quite the contrary, actually.

All my girlfriends (smart, attractive, wonderful women) frequently state that they despise being harassed by strangers at the bar, by colleagues at work or just out in the street. They don't like to be disturbed while out sipping cocktails with their friends, they say. And since the mentioned harassment here constitutes phenomena that I, the male, would label flirts, invitations, casual conversation and such, it's easy to see why the Swedish male sits alone at the bar watching hockey.

For a few years I actually did what my girlfriends recommended. I treated women like I would fellow men. No flirting. No complimenting their looks. No talking to strangers at the bar. No dinner invitations. No drinks. I was a living representation of the Ideal Feminist Man. I was also unkissed.

So I changed back to my former self, taking note that it now is as easy to score as it was back in the student days in Uppsala as long as I treat women like objects and pay huge restaurant tabs. But hey, I can afford that now, being an overpaid tv producer.

In one respect, I keep up the feminist ways, though. I never flirt with my co-workers. I always try to treat my colleagues like if I did not want to sleep with them. Which is quite an effort in my line of work where intelligent and beatiful women are a dime a dozen.

So now you know the truth about the Swedish male psyche! Hope this won't keep you from blogging, though. I'ts a great read!

5:03 PM  
Blogger Curiosa said...

Hello there. Thanks for the wonderful insight into the Swedish male pysche. I'll keep it in mind while I continue poking fun. Although to the credit of the strong, silent, nordic type, I must say that I was hankering to get back to Stockholm with it's "shy guys" after an extended vacation in Italy, where many men were self-proclaimed "God's gift to women" (imagine a really bad impersonation of an Italian accent).

8:12 PM  
Blogger Kontorsmyran said...

Haha, trodde alla visste att vi svenska killar är för försiktiga förvårat eget bästa.

Bra blogg annars!

11:20 AM  

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